This post was inspired by The Dinner, a novel by Herman Koch. Two brothers and their wives sit down for a tension filled dinner to discuss a tragedy that can change both families’ lives forever. Join From Left to Write on October 29 as we discuss The Dinner. As a member, I received a copy of the book for review purposes.
The world is a different place now than when I grew up. The sheer connectedness of the world would have been unfathomable when I was a teenager. I wonder what the world will be like when A is a teenager...
Today communication is at a teen's fingertips - the computer, phone, ipad. Texting, facebooking, tweeting - and those are probably past their prime! What is next? When I was a teen, I monopolized the phone and wrote in my journal. My mom probably heard all my conversations...and knew where I was going, with whom I was going, knew all the parents.
I do not actually know if she read my journals, and now as a parent, I start to wonder - how do you keep tabs on your kids? Is it ok to look at a text if you are worried? Is it ok to log in to your child's facebook account? When does it cross the line? What is protecting vs. invading privacy?
I would have been mortified if my mom had read my journals. I also did nothing at all interesting in high school, nothing for her to worry about at all. But what if there was something to worry about? What if they were depressed? Being bullied? Part of a crime?
I'm sure I will have to deal with this all too soon. I'm sure by then the technology will be completely different - maybe I will be able to read his mind? :0 No, but in all seriousness, I'm not sure where that line is...and how I'll figure it out?
What do you think about internet/texting privacy for teenagers?
I'm lucky my mom didn't speak English well She wouldn't have been able to understand what I wrote in my journal, even if she could decipher my bad handwriting.
ReplyDeleteMy book club loved this book, but it was so weird!! I am so glad my parents didn't read anything when I was growing up :)
ReplyDeleteAs a parent, I need to know what is going on with my kids, but I have to figure out their privacy line. But I also am much more concerned that my kids are healthy and safe than that they have a ton of privacy. There are areas that I must be involved in to help them grow up healthy. this sounds like an intriguing book!
ReplyDeleteLooks like we were thinking along the same lines. My parents definitely didn't intrude--they were busy with my other 3 siblings--but they should have. As for my kids, they are still young (6 and 8) but their use of technology is under supervision and with frequent checking. That will continue until they are adults and they've earned their privacy. Even though I was a good student and stayed out of trouble, I was bullied in middle and high schools and suffered from depression. My parents didn't have a clue. I will not be that way with my kids.
ReplyDeleteI often ask this question, too in regards to my 9 yr old. He is so capable of using various forms of technology. Recently, we had a run in with some inappropriate content on youtube that he found because it just popped up beside a mine craft video. We've since locked everything down and the times he does get to use computers/iPads, he is monitored closely. Not because we don't trust him, we just don't trust media.
ReplyDeleteWhat do I think...I think they are your kids therefore they have no privacy. If you want to keep them safe it is up to you as a parent to take that control whether they like it or not. :-)
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIt's a fine line between privacy and insuring your child's safety. The best policy is to teach them values that will help them make smart decisions without having to police them.
ReplyDeleteIn today's technology based world, I think we do need to invade our children's privacy a little bit to make sure they are safe.
ReplyDeleteMeghan- I continuously argue with parents about what type of technology kids need to have, so you pose a great question! I think kids need to be able to "call" their parents and the rest can be done at home...
ReplyDeletePrivacy is a tricky issue, but I think the bottom line is that my job is to keep my kids safe. I teach them how to use tech appropriately, and what to do if they feel uncomfortable. I think the best advice I have is to develop a relationship of trust as early on as you can, so it can carry with you during the teen years.
ReplyDeleteIt is a fine line...and one I pray is clear to me by the time my kids are at that age.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Jennifer...so much of it is about being proactive...using technology appropriately...and keeping the lines of communication open so, hopefully, she will come to me if she sees something that disturbs her...and we can continue to talk about how to treat people, both online and off.
ReplyDelete